Potato Family Values
Once upon a time there lived a family of potatoes - Mummy potato, Daddy potato and 3 daughters. Eventually the time came for the daughters to get married, so they set out into the world to try and find themselves husbands. A few months later the eldest daughter returned home bursting with excitement.
"Mum, Dad, I've got myself a boyfriend and we'll be getting married soon"
"That's wonderful", replied her parents, "but who is he?"
"You'll love him, his name's Dave and he's a Jersey Royal"
The parents were elated. "A Jersey Royal", they cried. "That's practically royalty".
Anyway, a few months later the 2nd daughter returned home. "Mum, Dad, I've met a bloke and we're getting married. And guess what? He's a King Edward!"
Obviously the parents were delighted. So after the royal wedding, they received a visit from the youngest daughter.
"Mum, dad, I've met someone too and I'm getting married"
"So who is he?" asked her mum and dad.
"It's John Motson, you know, off the telly."
At this point her parents started crying and wailing. "But you can't marry John Motson", they bemoaned.
"Why on earth not?" replied the daughter.
"Because he's just a common tater"